Tuesday, November 29, 2011

orthopedic doctor


how an orthopedic doctor works!

Sunday, November 27, 2011

3 Reasons 2 Give Exam


1. you can spend 3 hours in self meditation.

2. you can complete your sleep.

3. you can see your teachers being bored who usually bore you

Saturday, November 26, 2011

the cute loveletter!

Girlfriend: i kiss every stamp pasted on your letter addressed to me....because i know your lips would have touched it before while applying it!


Boyfriend: uhh!! actually i affix the stamps after rubbing them with my dog's nose!

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

can u plz help me

Me: “How can I help you today, ma’am?”

Client: “Is e-mail internet”?

Me: “I beg your pardon?”

Client: “Is e-mail on the internet? I have no internet, can I still read my e-mail?”

Me: “Well yes, you must be able to get online to view your e-mail.”

Client: “Oh, dear. I can’t see my e-mail.”

Me: “Well, let’s see. Can you open up Internet Explorer for me and tell me what you see?”

Client: “Open what?”

Me: “Your browser, can you open up your browser?”

Client: “My…my…?”

Me: “What you click on when you want to browse the internet?”

Client: “I don’t use anything, I just turn my computer on, and it’s there.”

Me: “Okay. Do you see the little blue ‘e’ icon on your desktop?”

Client: “You mean I have to start writing letters again?”

Me: “I’m…what, I’m sorry?”

Client: “I don’t have any pens at my desk. I just want my e-mail again.”

Me: “No, ma’am, your desktop, on your computer screen. Can you click on the little blue ‘e’ on your computer screen for me?”

Client: “Oh, this is too much work. I’m too upset. Just send me my e-mail. Can’t you send me my e-mail?”

Me: “We…okay, ma’am. Can you tell me what color the lights are on your router right now?”

Client: “My what?”

Me: “The little box with green or possibly a couple of red lights on it right now - it’s most likely near your computer?”

Client: “Lights and boxes, boxes and lights, just get my e-mail for me.

Me: “My test is showing that you should be able to get online right now. Can you tell me what you’re seeing on your computer screen?”

Client: “It’s been the same thing for the last two hours.”

Me: “An error message?”

Client: “No, just stars. It’s black and moving stars.”

Me: “…Do you see your mouse next to your keyboard?”

Client: “Yes.”

Me: “Move it for me.”

Client: “Move it?”

Me: “Yes. Move it.”

Client: “My e-mail!”

Friday, November 18, 2011

santa the scientist

A man jumped into the river and never came back.

Another man jumped, he also did not return.

Santa's conclusion: Man is soluble in water...!!
by:kunal

examinations!!

six things boys do in examination hall!
1> counting number of girls
2> sighting the lady supervisor
3> counting the number of windows and doors
4> seeing the brand name of pen
5> feelings for wasting the last night without studying
6> think to study well atleast for next exam

six things girls do in examination hall
(whether they know or don't know!)
1> write
2> write
3> write
4> write
5> write
6> write
god only knows what they write!!
by:ashish

Thursday, November 17, 2011

video game loco

Jack : I love Playing video game with my younger brother.
Friend: Why only your brother?
Jack: I always beat him.......................... when I lose.
by:kunal

The perfect computer


Wednesday, November 16, 2011

drunk men ask for lift

Three men were drunk, they stopped a taxi for a lift,
The taxi driver figured that they were drunk,he just switched on the engine & switched it off & told them, we have arrived.

The 1st guy gave him money,
2nd guy said thanks but the
3rd guy slapped him.

The taxi driver was stunned because he was hoping that none of them must have realized that the car didn't move an inch.
so he asked,what was that for?

Guy Replied, control your speed next time Dude,you almost killed us... 
by:kunal

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Indian newspaper headlines in 2060

Indian newspaper headlines in 2060:

Kasab dies at 70 in jail of high cholesterol due to too much biryani.
Golmaal part 27 is released,
Tusshar Kapoor is still unable to speak or act. 
Sharad Pawar owns half the world.
Facebook is declared a country.... ...
Raja's son is arrested for 16G scam.
Girl in Delhi travels 50 feet safely.
"Lakshadeep Cats" to be the 63rd team to join IPL.
by:kunal

financial management

A beggar found rs 100.
He went to 5 star hotel for dinner.
Had his delicious feast and bill amount was rs 3000.
With his total amount not worth paying the tip...Manager handed him to police.
He gave rs 100. to police and was set free.
Its called FINANCIAL MANAGEMENT without MBA.­ ­

by: kunal

Monday, November 14, 2011

optical illusion


stare at the center of the image....see the colours disappearing in a few seconds...
wonder how the hell does it happen!

Sunday, November 13, 2011

can't get funnier

Teacher: give me one example of a Coincident?

Santa: my mother and father, both have the same date as marriage anniversary..!

japanese tourist!

A Japanese came to India. He took a AUTO to go to the airport.
On the way a HONDA overtakes,
Japanese: HONDA made in JAPAN very fast.....
Next a TOYOTA overtakes, he said TOYOTA made in JAPAN, very fast.
Airport came he asked how much?
Driver: 8000Rs
Japanese: why so expensive?

Driver: METER made in INDIA very fast... ­ ­

Thursday, November 10, 2011

the intelligent girl!

Boy: How many apples can you eat in empty stomach?
Girl: I can eat 6 apples........
Boy: you can eat only 1 apple in empty stomach because when you eat the 2nd apple that's not in empty stomach........
Girl: wow super joke...... I'll tell my friend.
 
next day...
Girl to Other Girl: How many apple can you eat in empty stomach?
Other Girl: I can eat 10.
Girl: oh no, If you would have told 6 apples I could have shared a very nice joke with you !
 by: parth

Saturday, November 5, 2011

check your IQ


dont paste the answer here if you got it...share it on facebook or twitter with your friends to see their IQ