Saturday, May 5, 2012

Gujarati jokes

We never go to office, we go to HOFFIS!
The first rule of money - Never use your own!
"Su 6 Nava juni" is our version of wassup?
We keep an "ELARAAM" to wake up in the morning
No party is over without a round of GARBA
When someone asks about a person, we say GENTLEMAN MANAS 6!
"Saanti rakh ne ,loi no pee!" is our best possible slang
We have a PhD in Bargaining by birth..
We don't have feelings, we have PHILLINGS!!!
Jai Shri Krishan = Hello and Aavjo = Good bye
Generally our conversations begin with kem 6, maja ma ne, and end with,
koi saaru investment Hoy..Deel Beel hoy to bataav jo Bhai
For us electricity never goes - only light does!!!!
We don't call people, we COAL them
We Gujjus are everywhere, all over the globe - So deal with it...
We go to movie HOLE and take outside SNAKES for refreshments
Towel = Tooval
Every gujju will introduce their spouse as aa Mara Mr. 6, ne aa Mari Mrs. 6...
Mount Abu is Switzerland
Exam aave 6, beta notes JEROX karavanu bhoolto nai...
If all of a sudden u hear a Dhoom machale ringtone Its Gujju
Hindi humko Bahut faavta hai
if u are 15 or 50, ur parents will always refer to u as their Bebbi or Baabo
Gujjus don’t know what chocolate is, they only know CATBURY
If u don’t watch Tarak Mehta ka oolta chashmah u r not a gujju….yaar
Ultimate gujju gift - a 'cover' (envelope) with 500 +1 in it
We tk constitution very seriously, everybody is called Bhai and Ben
If u do not go for navratri, u don’t exist
Mango is not our national fruit only Kesar n Haphus is
Vile Parle and New Jersey feels like home - Aapnuj 6...
We eat homemade Theplas with chhundo and Athaanu in Business class flight
We can do garba on any song in the world
Falguni Pathak is Britney spears for us
After having chaat, bhelpuri, sevpuri, we make sure we ask for extra puri, and then discount
Order soup 1/2, 2 TIMES u get more quantity - be smart
U expect a discount at dollar store if u r a gujju
Always says Don’t Charge me TAX I am paying in CASH
U consider SpongeBob as Dhokla, u r Gujju
Dandiya is our prom
U find something gud n say "BAHU FINE 6!"
If a gujju starts coffee with Karan, he would name it as "chhas with chhagan"
" You know you are getting too old, when the candles cost more than the cake."
from @raincloudg (twitter) 
do share and comment if you agree